Sunday, July 10, 2005


Understanding, such a simple word and yet often not used enough. Why is it so difficult for us to be able to understand the people around you, why they are doing the things that they do and why they are reacting the way they are reacting? Sometimes all it takes is a little open-mindedness and a little sensitivity for us to put ourselves in the shoes of the people around you to avoid any misunderstandings and any unhappiness.

Ozzie has been the source of conflict between my dad and my sis. Both are equally stubborn and equally hard-mouthed. Dad is getting old and is getting very sensitive to any remarks about his authority in the family, perceived or otherwise. He is aware of the fact that we are all grown up and do not need him anymore but he just do not want to relinquished his authority and still prefer to think that we are still very much dependent on him. This evening, a tiny misunderstanding between him and sis resulted in a big row. I did not want to get involved and locked myself in the room when I heard a loud bang. He banged on the door when my sis locked herself in bro's room. Its fortunate that bro was back in camp, otherwise there would be an even worse row.

Naturally, I was pissed and shouted at him, "You are such a petty man!" The fact is, he locked Ozzie up cos she was barking. My sis on seeing that went to prepare the bed for Ozzie and accidentally let him loose. Dad took it that my sis was purposely going against him and the result was a shouting match between the two of them.

The moment I shouted the words, I regretted it. I don want to get involved in my family conflicts any more. It has no endings. No one wants to listen to logic and everyone including my dad just want to have the last say. My mum always end up trying to pacify the situation. Whats the point? I have since distanced myself from my parents since last year when I had a big row with my family over an Internet friend. They are more interested in making me behaving the way they want instead of accepting me the way I am. So I see no point in making them understand me at all. Might as well not do or say anything.

As usual, in the end, the row only stopped when I told my dad that I have nothing to say to him anymore, which was according to his wishes of asking me to shut up anyway. Just as well, he had the last say, he was happy, my sis back away from the confrontation since I was involved, my mum don have to pacify the situation, I held back my feelings and emotions, everyone was happy. And the best thing was the row ended.

Sometimes, a little understanding and sensitivity are all it needs in the family but it would seem that such simple attibutes are sorely lacking in mine. I am so tired of these all.

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