Sunday, October 09, 2005

There was a man..

There was once a man who was always very angry, perhaps about the way fate played with him. He liked to gamble and drink. The more he gambled, the more he will lose and the angrier he will become. Drinking and smoking then became his way of coping with his loses.

He had a wife, but he did not love her. Its a pre-arranged marriage perhaps and he used his wife to let go of his anger. He beat her up regularly and yet his wife continued to hold on to her marriage perhaps its cos she has no one to rely on or perhaps its cos there was no such thing as formal divorce during their times. As a result of that, she got 4 miscarriages and ended up in the hospital regularly. And still she continued to hold on to her marriage.

Then the man found a lady whom he liked and took her for his second wife. As a result, the beatings of his first wife became more frequent. Perhaps he just couldn't stand the sight of his defenseless first wife and wanted to show her his control and power over her or its just a case of just being mean. Initially, the first wife did not know that her husband had a second wife and continue to endure the beatings but when she found out, she began to fight back. Or perhaps its cos the man was also beating her children up and she had to protect them. In any case, both of them began to fight regularly. Their children became stuck in an endless conflict between their parents and grew up in a violent environment.

There was a girl. She grew up with stories of how her grandpa was always beating his children and her grandma up, how her grandpa was always gambling, drinking, smoking and whoring.

The man is now in his seventies and all his children dislike him. Its ironic that he has eleven children and 2 wives and yet, none of them wanted to have anything to do with him. Hes sick now, having just recovering from a stroke but none of his grand children even bother to visit him. The moment all his children, from both his wives, met in the hostpital, they started to argue about who should be taking care of him, pushing the responsibliites of taking care of their father to one another, and creating a nuisance of themselves.

The girl is sick and tired of all these and wonder constantly how on earth did she have a complicated family as such.


Paddy Tan said...

I will tell the girl to stay away from all these.

It can be a cause and effect of the deeds of this grandpa, resulting in the constant pushing of responsibilities to each others.

If they never been loved by him, will he expect the love to be returned?

Launa Lazariuk said...

We tend to want to detach ourselves from these type of people, the type of people who use violent means and are caught up in dependency.
It's, sometimes, not easy to assume responsibility for others, especially if we don't love that individual.

What's sad is that the dependent, violent individual needs help as do the others who were the subjects of his anger and dependancy. On the one hand, there is a slight social responsibility to take care of one's family. On the other hand, seemingly catering to someone who indirectly messed up your life does not sound pleasing.

I like what you wrote PAddy TAn. Especially the last sentence/

Paddy Tan said...

I totally agreed with what Jeniffer said... sometimes one have to measure it well on the action to take but not at the expenses of more unnecessary pain.

Thanks Jeniffer on your comment too. :)