I am going to break my personal rule of not talking about my job in my blog this time and rant about my work.
I have been working since last Mon and have not taken a break since. Even my weekend had been burnt and I feel giddy everytime I stepped into my office. Gosh.. I never knew that I am so hardworking..
The thing is, ever since Jaya left, my workload had increase. I had to learn how to take over her stuff, clear her backlog and correct her mistakes while at the same time clear my own stuff. Me and Eunis have been working until very late everyday. It would have been much easier if we know how to do Jaya's stuff instead of having to figure out as we go along. And the fact that she was quite messy in her work really made our job tougher.
I actually felt nauseous and giddy when I step into the office each day. Perhaps I had been seeing too much of that place already. And then the most incredible thing happened today, I had a nose bleed. This was the first time in my life ever to have a nose bleed.. I think my entire system is just too screwed up by the long hours and not enough rest.
Every morning, my mobile and my office phone will ring off the hook. Sometimes I even had to answer both phones together with people breathing down my neck, chasing me for some stuff while my boss was asking me about the inventory level and his revenues at the same time. If not for these, it would be some stupid problems which hindered the flow of my work. Take for example today, a specific new car had to be sent down to a customer's showroom by 9am tomorrow. This car was still at the port, yet to be cleared. The whole procedure was supposed to be very simple, the people at KD just needed to clear a container, truck out it out, unstuff at KD and then my car carriers will proceed to deliver it to the customer showroom. Simple and easy. Apparently, Mr Murphy decided to pay me a visit. Since we did not have the packing list, we did not know which containers contain the particular model that was needed. I figured, since out of the 15 cars in the port, 12 of it were the model that I needed, the probability of getting the correct model should be quite high. Wrong! The container that was being trucked out contain 2 cars and none of it was the correct one. By the time, I was informed about this problem, it was already at the end of the day and was very late. There wasn't any chassis available for us to truck out another container. And then when a chassis was found, there wasn't manpower available to do the unstuffing for us cos the people at KD had left. Luckily, my boss decided to help me and talk to the manager at KD. It was just 15mins earlier that I was informed the containers had been unstuffed and the cars had been trucked out, finally. So the only thing left would be for my car carriers to proceed with the delivery to our customer's place at the appointed time tomorrow. Phew, all these took up like 2 hours of my time.. I really, really hope that nothing will go wrong tomorrow. Mr Murphy, please fuck off and leave me alone, will ya..!
I am so tired.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Aaron
Today was my day shift. Bloody hell, I had been working for 7 days in a row already. Tired..
Anyway, today's partner was Aaron. Hes from the Fuchow province in China. He is only 23 years old and hes been working in Singapore for 2 years already. I spent the whole morning talking to him since I got not much things today to clear. Hes a very talkative chap, can really talk for hours. In fact, I found out a lot about the culture in China from him. Some of the stuff that he told me were actually quite insightful.
In his hometown, the young people there lead more slow and relax life. Most of them don work or study at the same time. Before coming to Singapore, his daily routine was to sleep until noon each day, worked as a salesman in a female boutique for like 5 hours and then went out and play. The most common pastime of young people there is to go cybercafes to surf and chat online, looking for friends or mates online. He used to spend the whole day in cybercafes. The rates there are very cheap, about 50cents per hour, in RMB. Cybercafes are a big thing in China, there can be like 3 such cyberbars, as what they call it there, in a small street. Each bar can hold 30-40 people. And sometimes they offer extra services like buying supper for the customers if they want to, since the competition is very stiff.
In China, the most important thing to remember when doing business is relationships with the correct people or a more popular term to call it in Chinese would be "guan xi". The reason why Suzhou industrial park was a flop was cos Singaporeans are too straightforward. We are too naive and are too used to following rules and laws. In China, the number one rule when doing business would be bribery. And it must be to the correct party. Singaporeans however are so used to doing everything by the book that we forgot that people in China are use to bending the rules. That is the reason why Singaporeans find it very hard to strike it out big there. In fact, according to Aaron, opportunitites are abound in China. As long as you have something unique to offer there, you will be able to make money. Because of the huge population there, as long as 1% of the population take notice of your products or services, you can make some profits there already. However, you must be able to bend the rules and follow their way of doing business. In other words, you must be prepared to bribe. Especially to authorities. Singaporeans are just too naive and so most of them failed in this aspect. In the end, whatever business ideas, however creative will also fail.
In each provinces of China, as long as you speak in a different accents, you will be treated as tourist or foreigners. And this make you a very good target to be bullied. There were many times when Aaron visted other provinces and even though hes a Chinese national, he was conned and bullied many times by the locals there. Imagine what will happen if you are not from China and is visiting there as a tourist. He cautioned me to be extra careful when visiting China because even the police there are corrupted. He said since these crooks have the guts to carry out their acts, this means that they are "protected" and have the right connections in the right place. One must be extra careful because even the authorities will not help you. Having money however would of course smoothen matters a great deal.
And I just found out that the agents earned a lot when they bring these foreign workers into Singapore to work. Aaron actually paid S$14k to his agent. Woah! Thats a lot of money to them! These agents are such blood suckers..
Then as the day passed, I was feeling so sick of the office that I actually felt nauseous and giddy. So David brought me out for dinner. Then I went to learn driving from him! Cool! Now I know how to do reverse parking!
The funny thing is that even though it was getting dark, David seemed reluctant to let me go home. He kept driving around in circles, talking to me. I guessed he was probably lonely and want to chat with me. At one point, he even asked me to go out and have a drink with him.. Woah..
So after driving around in circles in the yard for like 45 mins, he finally sent me back to the office. I was too tired to go out anyway, I still gotta work tomorrow.
Sometimes, all they really want is just a listening ear. They left their friends and familes behind when they came to work here and have no one to talk to. Besides, listening to them is quite refreshing cos their ideas and backgrounds are so different from what I encounter everyday. Actually, if time allows, I might just ask them out for dinner someday. They are really nice people, though a little vulgar sometimes.
Anyway, today's partner was Aaron. Hes from the Fuchow province in China. He is only 23 years old and hes been working in Singapore for 2 years already. I spent the whole morning talking to him since I got not much things today to clear. Hes a very talkative chap, can really talk for hours. In fact, I found out a lot about the culture in China from him. Some of the stuff that he told me were actually quite insightful.
In his hometown, the young people there lead more slow and relax life. Most of them don work or study at the same time. Before coming to Singapore, his daily routine was to sleep until noon each day, worked as a salesman in a female boutique for like 5 hours and then went out and play. The most common pastime of young people there is to go cybercafes to surf and chat online, looking for friends or mates online. He used to spend the whole day in cybercafes. The rates there are very cheap, about 50cents per hour, in RMB. Cybercafes are a big thing in China, there can be like 3 such cyberbars, as what they call it there, in a small street. Each bar can hold 30-40 people. And sometimes they offer extra services like buying supper for the customers if they want to, since the competition is very stiff.
In China, the most important thing to remember when doing business is relationships with the correct people or a more popular term to call it in Chinese would be "guan xi". The reason why Suzhou industrial park was a flop was cos Singaporeans are too straightforward. We are too naive and are too used to following rules and laws. In China, the number one rule when doing business would be bribery. And it must be to the correct party. Singaporeans however are so used to doing everything by the book that we forgot that people in China are use to bending the rules. That is the reason why Singaporeans find it very hard to strike it out big there. In fact, according to Aaron, opportunitites are abound in China. As long as you have something unique to offer there, you will be able to make money. Because of the huge population there, as long as 1% of the population take notice of your products or services, you can make some profits there already. However, you must be able to bend the rules and follow their way of doing business. In other words, you must be prepared to bribe. Especially to authorities. Singaporeans are just too naive and so most of them failed in this aspect. In the end, whatever business ideas, however creative will also fail.
In each provinces of China, as long as you speak in a different accents, you will be treated as tourist or foreigners. And this make you a very good target to be bullied. There were many times when Aaron visted other provinces and even though hes a Chinese national, he was conned and bullied many times by the locals there. Imagine what will happen if you are not from China and is visiting there as a tourist. He cautioned me to be extra careful when visiting China because even the police there are corrupted. He said since these crooks have the guts to carry out their acts, this means that they are "protected" and have the right connections in the right place. One must be extra careful because even the authorities will not help you. Having money however would of course smoothen matters a great deal.
And I just found out that the agents earned a lot when they bring these foreign workers into Singapore to work. Aaron actually paid S$14k to his agent. Woah! Thats a lot of money to them! These agents are such blood suckers..
Then as the day passed, I was feeling so sick of the office that I actually felt nauseous and giddy. So David brought me out for dinner. Then I went to learn driving from him! Cool! Now I know how to do reverse parking!
The funny thing is that even though it was getting dark, David seemed reluctant to let me go home. He kept driving around in circles, talking to me. I guessed he was probably lonely and want to chat with me. At one point, he even asked me to go out and have a drink with him.. Woah..
So after driving around in circles in the yard for like 45 mins, he finally sent me back to the office. I was too tired to go out anyway, I still gotta work tomorrow.
Sometimes, all they really want is just a listening ear. They left their friends and familes behind when they came to work here and have no one to talk to. Besides, listening to them is quite refreshing cos their ideas and backgrounds are so different from what I encounter everyday. Actually, if time allows, I might just ask them out for dinner someday. They are really nice people, though a little vulgar sometimes.
Thursday, August 25, 2005
David
It was my turn to do the night duty yesterday. With the LTA contract, the whole department had to rotate and do night duties cos LTA operates 24hours. I started work at 8pm and was supposed to finish at 8am the next day and then go for a day's break. The whole night turn out to be really interesting..
David was my partner for the night. Now, those of you who follow my blog closely, I talked about David before. To cut the whole story short, David is a Chinese national worker. Hes in charge of helping us shift out cars before these cars are being delivered or packed into containers. He does not look like a typical Chinese national, other than his strong Fujian accent when he is talking. Hes very tall and dark, due to being under the sun everyday. Just imagine a tall, dark, rather good looking guy with a very carefree way of walking and you get the whole picture.
It was about 4am when I finished my work for the day. During the whole time, David was acting like my big brother, he kept coming into the office and asking me to take a nap. There was even once when I went to the toilet. David was sleeping in the car outside and when he realized that I was missing from the office, he came looking for me. In the end, we both scared the wits out of each other when he came out of the office just as I was going in.. Bleah...
After I finished most of my work and after my brain refused to continue thinking straight, I went outside to join David in his car. At first, we were too hyper to sleep, so he took me to visit his hostel. Turned out, its actually an empty office in the middle of the yard where all the cars are being parked. The whole place looked really bare and eerie but him and Aaron, another Chinese national stayed there. That was their home.
Then he drove us back and we just lied on the front seats of the car. He pushed them back all the way so that they resembled make-shift beds. Just trying to get some comfort out of our limited space. Perhaps its cos of the mozzies flying around or perhaps it was cos of the cold in the night, but both of us can't sleep. So we talked.
We talked about lots of stuff, about his hometown in the Fujian province in China, his lost dreams of striking out a career, his 3 year stint in the Chinese army, his near escape with getting hitched to his Commander's daughter, his wife, his desire of having a family to return to after a hard day's work, his way of resorting to smoking, drinking so as to soothe his homesickness.
We talked about how he would like to go up to the roof-top and look at the moon when he just came to Singapore 3 years ago, how his agent dumped him here leaving him penniless and hungry, how he was betrayed by his a friend whome he considered to be his brother.
We talked about his views towards Singapore and Singaporeans as a whole. He thinks Singapore is a wonderful place to live in even though the cost of living is very high here and how really wants to have a PR here. He also happens to think that most Singaporeans are naive and simple minded and obedient.
We also crapped a lot, about our boss, about our horoscopes and even about palm reading. He said I would be involved in a three-way relationship during the later part of my life. Incidentally, he was the third person to comment about that. We also talked about how girls in Singapore are so much different from China, Korea etc. We also talked about my siblings conflicts, my nagging mother, his elder sisters whom he missed, his wife whom he has yet to go through the traditional marriage ceremony with and his desire of having a car to drive his wife and childrens around, if he really do have children. We also gossiped a lot about our boss and the department as a whole and the management.
Its really weird but he is a man of few words and yet during last night, both of us talked like we knew each other for a long time. So, the 2 of us were lying in the car, side by side, and looking at the roof of the car while talking non-stop all through the night. At one point, he drove us to the 2nd level where it was really dark cos I commented that its getting brighter and I have yet to catch my sleep. And yet, while we were there on the 2nd level of the warehouse, in total darkness except for the lights on the radio of the car, we still can't sleep. We just talked and talked and talked.
I was glad that I went for the night duty cos I think I have made contact with another human being that night.
David was my partner for the night. Now, those of you who follow my blog closely, I talked about David before. To cut the whole story short, David is a Chinese national worker. Hes in charge of helping us shift out cars before these cars are being delivered or packed into containers. He does not look like a typical Chinese national, other than his strong Fujian accent when he is talking. Hes very tall and dark, due to being under the sun everyday. Just imagine a tall, dark, rather good looking guy with a very carefree way of walking and you get the whole picture.
It was about 4am when I finished my work for the day. During the whole time, David was acting like my big brother, he kept coming into the office and asking me to take a nap. There was even once when I went to the toilet. David was sleeping in the car outside and when he realized that I was missing from the office, he came looking for me. In the end, we both scared the wits out of each other when he came out of the office just as I was going in.. Bleah...
After I finished most of my work and after my brain refused to continue thinking straight, I went outside to join David in his car. At first, we were too hyper to sleep, so he took me to visit his hostel. Turned out, its actually an empty office in the middle of the yard where all the cars are being parked. The whole place looked really bare and eerie but him and Aaron, another Chinese national stayed there. That was their home.
Then he drove us back and we just lied on the front seats of the car. He pushed them back all the way so that they resembled make-shift beds. Just trying to get some comfort out of our limited space. Perhaps its cos of the mozzies flying around or perhaps it was cos of the cold in the night, but both of us can't sleep. So we talked.
We talked about lots of stuff, about his hometown in the Fujian province in China, his lost dreams of striking out a career, his 3 year stint in the Chinese army, his near escape with getting hitched to his Commander's daughter, his wife, his desire of having a family to return to after a hard day's work, his way of resorting to smoking, drinking so as to soothe his homesickness.
We talked about how he would like to go up to the roof-top and look at the moon when he just came to Singapore 3 years ago, how his agent dumped him here leaving him penniless and hungry, how he was betrayed by his a friend whome he considered to be his brother.
We talked about his views towards Singapore and Singaporeans as a whole. He thinks Singapore is a wonderful place to live in even though the cost of living is very high here and how really wants to have a PR here. He also happens to think that most Singaporeans are naive and simple minded and obedient.
We also crapped a lot, about our boss, about our horoscopes and even about palm reading. He said I would be involved in a three-way relationship during the later part of my life. Incidentally, he was the third person to comment about that. We also talked about how girls in Singapore are so much different from China, Korea etc. We also talked about my siblings conflicts, my nagging mother, his elder sisters whom he missed, his wife whom he has yet to go through the traditional marriage ceremony with and his desire of having a car to drive his wife and childrens around, if he really do have children. We also gossiped a lot about our boss and the department as a whole and the management.
Its really weird but he is a man of few words and yet during last night, both of us talked like we knew each other for a long time. So, the 2 of us were lying in the car, side by side, and looking at the roof of the car while talking non-stop all through the night. At one point, he drove us to the 2nd level where it was really dark cos I commented that its getting brighter and I have yet to catch my sleep. And yet, while we were there on the 2nd level of the warehouse, in total darkness except for the lights on the radio of the car, we still can't sleep. We just talked and talked and talked.
I was glad that I went for the night duty cos I think I have made contact with another human being that night.
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Time
Revisted my old journal and found these 2 phrases about time in it. Forgot where I found them but they certainly made a lot of sense..!
"Hope, which whispered from Pandora's box only after all the other plagues and sorrows had escaped is the best and last of all things. Without it, there is only time. And time pushes at our back like a centrifuge, forcing us outward and away until it nudges us into oblivion."
"Like all things in the universe, we are destined from birth to diverge. Time is simply the yardstick of our separation. If we are particles in a sea of distance, exploded from an original whole then there is a science to our solitude. We are lonely in proportion to our years."
"Hope, which whispered from Pandora's box only after all the other plagues and sorrows had escaped is the best and last of all things. Without it, there is only time. And time pushes at our back like a centrifuge, forcing us outward and away until it nudges us into oblivion."
"Like all things in the universe, we are destined from birth to diverge. Time is simply the yardstick of our separation. If we are particles in a sea of distance, exploded from an original whole then there is a science to our solitude. We are lonely in proportion to our years."
Monday, August 22, 2005
So busy out there, so lonely inside.
In the midst of my pursuit for material comfort, I have always ask myself, "Why am I doing the stuff that I am doing everyday? Why do I even bother?"
Cos I just can't help but feel really empty everyday after a busy day at work. Its like everything that you have ever pursued is just a handful of dirt, which will always elude you no matter how much you try to hold it down.
I died another day today.
Has anyone feel that way?
Cos I just can't help but feel really empty everyday after a busy day at work. Its like everything that you have ever pursued is just a handful of dirt, which will always elude you no matter how much you try to hold it down.
I died another day today.
Has anyone feel that way?
CNY Cabbie
CNY Cabbie
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
I had a bad tummyache tonight so I took a cab home.
I felt like I was in the midst of Chinese New Year manz...! There were so many ding ding dong dong hanging all over the cabs!
Kinda stuffy cos these stuff were all over the cab that I felt a little overcrowded.. I have claustrophobia..
Weird..
Bitch
I really can't stand this sis of mine. She is so judgemental, bitchy and yet she is always acusing me of that.
Her ex-boyfriend came over to our house 2 days ago. He still cannot get over the fact that my sis dump him for another guy.. He bought a lot of food for Ozzie, and also a jacket for my sis. From the looks of it, that piece of Adidas jacket must have cost a bomb. He also told my mum that she can just call him if we need anything. Sigh, even I cannot help but felt really sorry for him. Hes such a nice guy, a little boring perhaps but is a very honest and down-to-earth guy.
Instead of returning the jacket to him, my stupid sis choose to accept it. And the best excuse that she can come up with is that she will be getting him a gift in return for the jacket since there is nothing he can do with a female jacket anyway!
WTF lah! Its people's money, if you don want him, just return him his stuff lah! Why would you still care what he is going to do with the jacket! Fuck lah! So I told her off and she said I am judging her!
Look whos talking! Whos the bitch who is saying that I am a slut for meeting boys online? Whos the bitch who is always accusing me of sleeping with all the guys that I met online? Whos the bitch who is always reminding me that I am a slut?
Judgemental? My foot! And I was not even judging her, I just want her to not do something that is going to hurt her poor ex-boyfriend's feelings further. Loving someone who betrayed you is the worse thing to happen to anyone..
Her ex-boyfriend came over to our house 2 days ago. He still cannot get over the fact that my sis dump him for another guy.. He bought a lot of food for Ozzie, and also a jacket for my sis. From the looks of it, that piece of Adidas jacket must have cost a bomb. He also told my mum that she can just call him if we need anything. Sigh, even I cannot help but felt really sorry for him. Hes such a nice guy, a little boring perhaps but is a very honest and down-to-earth guy.
Instead of returning the jacket to him, my stupid sis choose to accept it. And the best excuse that she can come up with is that she will be getting him a gift in return for the jacket since there is nothing he can do with a female jacket anyway!
WTF lah! Its people's money, if you don want him, just return him his stuff lah! Why would you still care what he is going to do with the jacket! Fuck lah! So I told her off and she said I am judging her!
Look whos talking! Whos the bitch who is saying that I am a slut for meeting boys online? Whos the bitch who is always accusing me of sleeping with all the guys that I met online? Whos the bitch who is always reminding me that I am a slut?
Judgemental? My foot! And I was not even judging her, I just want her to not do something that is going to hurt her poor ex-boyfriend's feelings further. Loving someone who betrayed you is the worse thing to happen to anyone..
Sunday, August 21, 2005
"Overseas" trip
DSC00094
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
Went back to JB for my supposedly last eye check up. Initially I tot that I will be going alone but then Chingnee decided to accompany me along, thanks pal!
The clinic had renovated since the last time I was there. They opened up more space and the whole place look huge, although the waiting room still loooked very much the same. Memories, memories..
Anyway, I was told that since my eyesight is still not perfet yet, they will have to give me a through eye checkup 3 months later to ascertain if its due to my muscle or due to the thickness of the cornea. If its the latter, I would have to go through a 2nd surgery again to correct this defect but if its the former, there is nothing much surgery can do to help me, I would probably have to live with this for the rest of my life.. Scary..
And after the checkup, me and CN went to shop around in the building, although I have already seen pretty much of the place there. Went to my favourite Pikachu restaurant and gorge myself until I felt really stuffy for the rest of the day.
The Causeway was jammed badly when I was coming back. Bloody hell, I really hate to cross the Causeway, its hot, stuffy and messy and polluted everywhere with huge trucks trying to squeeze in every lanes. I absolutely hate it.. To think I will have to cross it again if I need to go back for the surgery. DAMN!
Saturday, August 20, 2005
Judgement
Woud you judge someone if he or she has a different set of values or place different priorities or have a lifestlye that is different from you? Would you feel weird if that someone is your closed friend or is someone whom you respect and admire a lot and then it turns out, this person is engaged in something that makes you rethink your admiration or respect for them?
Lets say someone whom you respected a lot told you that she is involved with a married man. She knows that what she is doing is going to hurt the parties involved and yet she still carry on with what she is doing. You, on the other hand, is someone who has a very well-defined set of rights and wrongs. What your friend is doing is going against with your values and you do not feel comfortable with it.
Will you judge her and lose your respect for her?
Unfortunately, humans are flawed. Everyone has committed certain acts in their lives which they are not proud of. This is cos sometimes temptations are just too much for us to avoid. If that is the case, who are we to judge others, much less than to lecture on them for their actions. The values that you define as right or wrong are only limited to your definition and other people's definition will differ from you. So which set of definitions do you rely on when you are making your judgement of others, your friend or yours?
Lets say someone whom you respected a lot told you that she is involved with a married man. She knows that what she is doing is going to hurt the parties involved and yet she still carry on with what she is doing. You, on the other hand, is someone who has a very well-defined set of rights and wrongs. What your friend is doing is going against with your values and you do not feel comfortable with it.
Will you judge her and lose your respect for her?
Unfortunately, humans are flawed. Everyone has committed certain acts in their lives which they are not proud of. This is cos sometimes temptations are just too much for us to avoid. If that is the case, who are we to judge others, much less than to lecture on them for their actions. The values that you define as right or wrong are only limited to your definition and other people's definition will differ from you. So which set of definitions do you rely on when you are making your judgement of others, your friend or yours?
Sunday, August 14, 2005
Hatred and anger
You know how sometimes when you are really angry and you feel like destroying something? How you want to hurt the people around you so that they will be made to suffer exactly the kind of anger and hurt that you are suffering? How you want people to know how you are feeling at the moment so that they will be able to know what you are going through at the moment cos there simply are no words to describe how you are feeling at the moment?
Well, I am feeling like this at the moment.
The anger just builds up slowly at first, little by little. Its just a tiny irritation initially. Then, like a fireball rolling down the hill, the momentum builds up and then anger becomes uncontrollable. Finally, it becomes a large fireball and there is no way of putting out the fire and it just starts to burn down and destroy whatever that stand in its path or whatever that are near it.
As the fire burns uncontrollably, the fumes become higher and the object of my anger turns into the object of my hatred. Everything just burst into flames and by this time, there is nothing that can be done to tame or put out the fire. The only way would be to wait for the fireball to burn out by itself.
I felt like tearing myself apart, and hurt the people whom I care around me. Whoever speaks to me are going to get hurting words from me. I don give a fucking care, you can choose not to talk to me, so fuck off if you get hurt. No one cares, so why should I give a bloody damn.
I hate you, you know who you are.
Well, I am feeling like this at the moment.
The anger just builds up slowly at first, little by little. Its just a tiny irritation initially. Then, like a fireball rolling down the hill, the momentum builds up and then anger becomes uncontrollable. Finally, it becomes a large fireball and there is no way of putting out the fire and it just starts to burn down and destroy whatever that stand in its path or whatever that are near it.
As the fire burns uncontrollably, the fumes become higher and the object of my anger turns into the object of my hatred. Everything just burst into flames and by this time, there is nothing that can be done to tame or put out the fire. The only way would be to wait for the fireball to burn out by itself.
I felt like tearing myself apart, and hurt the people whom I care around me. Whoever speaks to me are going to get hurting words from me. I don give a fucking care, you can choose not to talk to me, so fuck off if you get hurt. No one cares, so why should I give a bloody damn.
I hate you, you know who you are.
Mac mini anyone?
Mac Mini
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
This is so darn coo! I am actually writing this entry with a Mac Mini, bluetooth keyboard and mouse and the monitor is actually a TV! WOW!
What happened was that I slept over at Eelin's house. And then I discovered that she actually has a Mac mini hooked onto her TV. I was so excited that I took pictures of the whole setpup while Eelin looked at me in amusment, labelling me "Internet Junkie" at the same time. But who bothers, I am just so excited that I will be able to play on it..!
At this moment, I am alone in her house. Her parents and her had gone to church and she asked me to wait for her to return and lunch with her later in the afternoon. I am just so excited with playing her new toy and I can't believe it when she said "ok. lets set up the machine for you to play." Cool!
The only complain that I have about this setpup is that the screen is a little too far from the sofa and I have some difficulties making out the words that I am writing now. Have to squint my eyes a little.. :D
I am definitely going to be coming to her house more often now.... Heh..
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Full cup, half cup or just a broken cup?
Can there be really a long lasting commitment between 2 persons? This was the question that I have been asking myself since last night, after hearing my sis telling me that she very cold-heartedly ended her 4 years long relationship with her boyfriend, who by the way was still very much infactuated with her. She said that the relationship was getting 'routine, stale" and her feelings, the spark had died. She is going to have some serious explaining to do to my parents who were looking really forward to him as a son-in-law.
My point is, can there ever truly be a long lasting love for someone else? A love so deep that the spark will never vanish and the relationship just goes on and on forever, till-death-do-us-apart kind of love. Does anyone still believe in that now? I used to.
I used to believe that when you fall in love, really deeply in love, you will never fall out of it, cos you will just continue falling harder and harder until you cannot even pull yourself out of the ditch that you fell into without even realizing it. I use to believe that if I were to really fall in love with someone else, I will commit my whole for this someone, my body and my soul. Thats why I don fall in love so easily cos its difficult to get me to really fall deep and hard for someone else. My philosophy is, there is no such thing as half a cup of love, there is either a full cup or an empty cup.
However, recent events prove to me that there can actually be half cups of love.
And with my sis's experience, I was left wondering, can there ever be a love that last a lifetime where 2 person will stay commited to each other and be there for each other? I had been through 2 types of relationship, the first one with someone who wanted to commit with me initially but then the feelings just died off and the second one with someone who wants no commitment with me. The first one being a full cup of love but in the end, became empty cup and the second, a broken cup?
I think I was just too naive to be disillusioned with all these stupid romantic thoughts. Perhaps I have really learnt my lesson. Whatever the case, I don for one believe that i can fall in love or stay commited ever again, and I am not so foolish as to think that there will be a Mr Right for me. There is no Mr Right or Miss Right, for that matter. Its just a term coined up by romantic empty-headed boys or girls who are always on the lookout for romance to give meaning to their lives. And on the same note, I think all relationships will end, one way or another, its just a matter of time. If you are happy, then stay together, if not, then go separate ways. There really is no such thing as a long lasting love cos there really is no love to begin in the first place, its just timed-infactuation, if I may put it that way. Sooner or later, the infactuation will fade and then its time to wake up and move on.
Indochine
DSC00061
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
Had a gathering of sorts with the girls at Indochine, without Eelin and Weili. The former had to go for her cell group while the latter got really sick..
So, to keep you 2 updated on what happened, I took some pictures and put them here, just for you girls!
Everything had not seem to change much amongst us except for our experiences, specifically our relationship problems. My sis just ended her 4 year long relationship, C with her own set of headaches while I still have yet to get over my emotional issues.
Other than that, LF and her beau seems to get along fine while JP, the most innocent one, had just realized that in a relationship, quarrels can actually happened! Eh, girl, I think I can pass on the title of Blur Queen to you now...
Then, C's friend brought along his friend to join us. For some reason, I found that his friend looked really familar and then it struck me that I actually met this guy twice on the IRC. Maybe I was wrong but he certainly looked very much like the horny guy that I bumped into on IRC, not once but twice! Hows that for a coincidence.. Perhaps thats why I did not really have a good feeling towards him, he looked like he was on the lookout for some girls to get laid and I think he looked a little lecherous too. The fact that hes already about our age and still patronise Zouk made him seem more like a guy whos on the look out for young girls to get laid..
Oh well, thats his lifestyle.. And here are my pictures of the gathering.. Listened to a wonderful live band and kind of enjoy ourself although in the end, we started to get bored and left..
So here you are girls, the pictures for the night...
Friday, August 12, 2005
Quidam
"Quidam: a nameless passer-by, a solitary figure lingering on a street corner, a person rushing past. It could be anyone, anybody. Someone coming, going, living in our anonymous society. A member of the crowd, one of the silent majority. The one who cries out, sings and dreams within us all.
A young girl fumes; she has already seen everything there is to see, and her world has lost all meaning. Her anger shatters her little world, and she finds herself in the universe of Quidam. She is joined by a joyful companion as well as another character, more mysterious, who will attempt to seduce her with the marvelous, the unsettling, and the terrifying."
Following the success of Saltimbanco and Alegria, The Circus of the Sun is now back to present Quidam.
Anyone?
Sunset
sunset
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
Found 2 rather old pictures in my photo album taken by sis when she just bought her new camera. I have always liked this picture, its got a very good angle of the sun and the shadows made my balcony looked very warm and cosy, even though its really hot and glaring at the time the picture was taken..
The reason being that my flat faces the sun directly and when its sunset, I can see the whole full Apollo staring straight at my face if I were standing in my balcony...
Painfully hot..
Thursday, August 11, 2005
All You Wanted (was somebody who cares)
I wanted to be like you
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away
I didn't know that it was so cold
And you needed someone
to show you the way
So I took your hand and we figured out
That when the tide comes
I'd take you away
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
I'm sinking slowly
So hurry hold me
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
All you wanted was somebody who cares
If you need me you know I'll be there
Oh, yeah
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away
I didn't know that it was so cold
And you needed someone
to show you the way
So I took your hand and we figured out
That when the tide comes
I'd take you away
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
I'm sinking slowly
So hurry hold me
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
All you wanted was somebody who cares
If you need me you know I'll be there
Oh, yeah
If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Memories
It seems that old memories just refuse to stay buried and die away.
Sometimes I really wonder at the ability of the human's mind to remember so much stuff and yet there are other times, I really wish that the brain is not such an amazing mass of human tissue. These are times when I just want to give my brain a thorough wash and delete away whatever painful memories that I have. These are times when I wish that I could just feel nothing and live my days as what they are, even though its rather empty and passive at the moment. These are times when I really wish I can forget.
If only life is just like a Word document. If you do not like whatever you write, you can just backspace and delete away those parts. Or just undo, thats an even better option. The page will remain as white and as new as before, no stains, no scars, no nothing. like a brand new piece of paper. Why can't life be as simple as that?
Man have invented so many ways to turn the old and ugly into new and beautiful but I think the best invention that can possibly happen would be the ability to turn old hurts into naught, into nothing. So that one remains brand new and without any hurt or pain. Or perhaps just turn back time, so that whatever happened can be erased off and then start everything afresh. No pain felt or no feelings hurt.
That would certainly be amazing.
Sometimes I really wonder at the ability of the human's mind to remember so much stuff and yet there are other times, I really wish that the brain is not such an amazing mass of human tissue. These are times when I just want to give my brain a thorough wash and delete away whatever painful memories that I have. These are times when I wish that I could just feel nothing and live my days as what they are, even though its rather empty and passive at the moment. These are times when I really wish I can forget.
If only life is just like a Word document. If you do not like whatever you write, you can just backspace and delete away those parts. Or just undo, thats an even better option. The page will remain as white and as new as before, no stains, no scars, no nothing. like a brand new piece of paper. Why can't life be as simple as that?
Man have invented so many ways to turn the old and ugly into new and beautiful but I think the best invention that can possibly happen would be the ability to turn old hurts into naught, into nothing. So that one remains brand new and without any hurt or pain. Or perhaps just turn back time, so that whatever happened can be erased off and then start everything afresh. No pain felt or no feelings hurt.
That would certainly be amazing.
Jon's Birthday
Set143_20
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
T'was DoreAmon's birthday celebration on Mon. The actual hatchday for this old Doremon is actually this Fri but we had the celebration on Mon instead since its convenient and no one gotta work on Tue.
Anyway, it was a hilarous party and everyone was enjoying themselves.. This is really a cheerio bunch of people, a little geeky no doubt, but still very fun to be with...!
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Most embarassing phone conversation
Ok, this was a very awkward situation.
I was looking through my wardrobe trying to make up my mind on what clothes I should wear for my outing today. Just as I was going to make up my mind, I had a phone call. It was from a UOB agent, trying to get me to meet up with him so that he can advise me on some insurance policies.
So, I went to answer the phone, in my birthday suit. The door was closed and the only other person in the house was my mom and she was sound asleep. Thinking that my door was securely locked, I did not give it a second thought and continue trying to get the agent off my back and end the call.
As I was just halfway through my phone conversation, when the really unexpected happened. My mother burst through my door! Gawd! I could have just fainted from the shock of my life!
There I was sitting on a chair, butt naked, trying my darndest to get the agent to hang up the phone and there was this half-awaken woman with hair sticking out all over her head bursting into my room without knocking, trying to get me to read out a message for her!
I froze! I couldn't even bring myself to exclaim to this crazy woman that I was naked and get her to get out of my room! Because I still had the agent on the phone and I did not want him to know that I was talking to him while in my birthday suit!
My mother on the other hand exclaimed, "Aiyoh, whatever are you doing in your room naked! Why are you naked?"
At that point, I really wanted to dig a hole, throw myself into it and never crawl out again. The agent on my phone must have heard me cos he stopped talking for a while and there was silence.
I firgured since he already heard my mum, I might as well shout for that woman to get out. So I went "Get out. NOW!"
She went laughing, get this, LAUGHING and then went out and closed the door after her! Had the nerve to laugh! Damn it!
I quickly made up some excuse to the agent and then hang up the phone. But I just have the strongest feeling that he was laughing with his toes at me on the other side of cos I could just hear his sniggers.. Damn it, that was my most embarassing phone conversation EVER!
After that, I went to confront my old woman.
"Would you mind knocking on my door before you enter? Its really rude and see the embarassment you caused me! And I was on the phone so you shouldn't have shout so loud that I was naked ok! So embarassing!"
"How the hell am I supposed to know that you were naked ah? And just what were you doing naked in your room?"
"To change lah! Then what the hell do you think I would be naked for?!"
In all my 25 years of living, I have never had such an embarassing phone conversation. And I was totally caught off guard. Darn it!
I was looking through my wardrobe trying to make up my mind on what clothes I should wear for my outing today. Just as I was going to make up my mind, I had a phone call. It was from a UOB agent, trying to get me to meet up with him so that he can advise me on some insurance policies.
So, I went to answer the phone, in my birthday suit. The door was closed and the only other person in the house was my mom and she was sound asleep. Thinking that my door was securely locked, I did not give it a second thought and continue trying to get the agent off my back and end the call.
As I was just halfway through my phone conversation, when the really unexpected happened. My mother burst through my door! Gawd! I could have just fainted from the shock of my life!
There I was sitting on a chair, butt naked, trying my darndest to get the agent to hang up the phone and there was this half-awaken woman with hair sticking out all over her head bursting into my room without knocking, trying to get me to read out a message for her!
I froze! I couldn't even bring myself to exclaim to this crazy woman that I was naked and get her to get out of my room! Because I still had the agent on the phone and I did not want him to know that I was talking to him while in my birthday suit!
My mother on the other hand exclaimed, "Aiyoh, whatever are you doing in your room naked! Why are you naked?"
At that point, I really wanted to dig a hole, throw myself into it and never crawl out again. The agent on my phone must have heard me cos he stopped talking for a while and there was silence.
I firgured since he already heard my mum, I might as well shout for that woman to get out. So I went "Get out. NOW!"
She went laughing, get this, LAUGHING and then went out and closed the door after her! Had the nerve to laugh! Damn it!
I quickly made up some excuse to the agent and then hang up the phone. But I just have the strongest feeling that he was laughing with his toes at me on the other side of cos I could just hear his sniggers.. Damn it, that was my most embarassing phone conversation EVER!
After that, I went to confront my old woman.
"Would you mind knocking on my door before you enter? Its really rude and see the embarassment you caused me! And I was on the phone so you shouldn't have shout so loud that I was naked ok! So embarassing!"
"How the hell am I supposed to know that you were naked ah? And just what were you doing naked in your room?"
"To change lah! Then what the hell do you think I would be naked for?!"
In all my 25 years of living, I have never had such an embarassing phone conversation. And I was totally caught off guard. Darn it!
Saturday, August 06, 2005
Crazy doggie..
DSC00039
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
I was using my iBook in my dining area one night and Ozzie was lying on the floor near me.. My sis was not around so she had no one to play with.
Most probably she was feeling very bored so she start to tear apart her pillow again. She was lying on her back and holding her pillow with her paws and biting and chewing on the poor pillow crazily.. She was actually so intense in her play that she did not even know that I was observing her in amusement!
Parrot
DSC00036
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
Parrot has a very clever skill, it laughs! Like a normal human.. Whenever it hears us laugh, it will break out in chuckles and its like a cycle. We laugh, it laughs, then when we hear its laugh, we laugh even harder and so the cycle continues..
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Burb.....
DSC00029
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
YES! I finally said the phrase that I wanted to say for a long time! I was approached by a salesman who wanted to sell me contact lens and I looked at him in the eyes and said "I don need contacts."
Wow! The exihilaration of saying these 4 words! After 17 years of shortsightedness, (I wore my first pair of glasses when I was just 8 years old), just by saying these 4 words alone was enough to make me go "YES!". I exclaimed so loud that a man standing in front of me on the escalator turned around and looked at the commotion behind..
Went to have dinner with DK. Initially wanted to go catch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but missed the timing so went to have dinner instead. Didn't realize I was so hungry until I thought of food. Finished the whole set of pig's organ soup with a whole full bowl of rice.. Burb.. Practically licked the bowls dry.. I also finished half of a Chicago cheesecake.. Hmm, ever wonder why cheesecakes are being named after American States? New York cheesecakes and now this Chicago cheesecake.. Are there really any differences..??
Oh dear, I think I am going to have gastric pain now..
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
How to forget
Jen makes the best of a Brad situation
Jennifer Aniston says she'll love Brad Pitt "for the rest of my life." But try as she might to be gracious and strong, the actress can't help but weep when she considers that Angelina Jolie might be carrying his child.
Writer Leslie Bennetts brings up the rumor in the new issue of Vanity Fair, where Aniston talks for the first time about her breakup.
Aniston, who has avoided reading the tabloids, looks as if she's been stabbed in the heart. "Her eyes well up and spill over and she cries for several long minutes," writes Bennetts. Aniston says she'd hoped to spend the last year being pregnant, and that she resented claims she didn't want to start a family.
"A man divorcing would never be accused of choosing career over children," she says. "That really p--ed me off. I've never in my life said I didn't want to have children. I did and I do and I will!"
Aniston still calls Pitt "a fantastic man. I don't regret any of it. ... I really do hope that someday we can be friends again."
But Aniston's pals say Pitt checked out of the marriage as soon as he met Jolie on the set of "Mr. & Mrs. Smith." They note that he even failed to make the taping of her final episode of "Friends." When she reached out for her husband's support, she says, "He just wasn't there for me."
Does Aniston buy his claim that he didn't cheat on her before they separated?
"I choose to believe my husband," says Aniston, who nevertheless was hurt by that W magazine portfolio of Pitt and Jolie playing husband and wife.
"There's a sensitivity chip that's missing [in him]," she says. "I can ... imagine Brad having absolutely no clue why people would be appalled by it."
She also was wounded by the pictures of Pitt with Jolie and her son, Maddox, on vacation in Africa. "I can't say it was one of the highlights of my year," she says. "[But] you joke and say, 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.'"
She also can't resist a wry dig at Pitt's new blond dye job.
"Billy Idol called," she says. "He wants his look back."
Its so hard to forget..
Jennifer Aniston says she'll love Brad Pitt "for the rest of my life." But try as she might to be gracious and strong, the actress can't help but weep when she considers that Angelina Jolie might be carrying his child.
Writer Leslie Bennetts brings up the rumor in the new issue of Vanity Fair, where Aniston talks for the first time about her breakup.
Aniston, who has avoided reading the tabloids, looks as if she's been stabbed in the heart. "Her eyes well up and spill over and she cries for several long minutes," writes Bennetts. Aniston says she'd hoped to spend the last year being pregnant, and that she resented claims she didn't want to start a family.
"A man divorcing would never be accused of choosing career over children," she says. "That really p--ed me off. I've never in my life said I didn't want to have children. I did and I do and I will!"
Aniston still calls Pitt "a fantastic man. I don't regret any of it. ... I really do hope that someday we can be friends again."
But Aniston's pals say Pitt checked out of the marriage as soon as he met Jolie on the set of "Mr. & Mrs. Smith." They note that he even failed to make the taping of her final episode of "Friends." When she reached out for her husband's support, she says, "He just wasn't there for me."
Does Aniston buy his claim that he didn't cheat on her before they separated?
"I choose to believe my husband," says Aniston, who nevertheless was hurt by that W magazine portfolio of Pitt and Jolie playing husband and wife.
"There's a sensitivity chip that's missing [in him]," she says. "I can ... imagine Brad having absolutely no clue why people would be appalled by it."
She also was wounded by the pictures of Pitt with Jolie and her son, Maddox, on vacation in Africa. "I can't say it was one of the highlights of my year," she says. "[But] you joke and say, 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.'"
She also can't resist a wry dig at Pitt's new blond dye job.
"Billy Idol called," she says. "He wants his look back."
Its so hard to forget..
Tuesdays
I have a love-hate relationship with Tuesdays.
Its CSI day on Tuesday. And I get to see Grissom and gang perfoming magic in their labs with their amazing, but possibly fake equipment. And also get to hear witty and sometimes dry jokes cracked by them when they are performing their magic. Amazing..
The problem is that I always sleep very late on Sundays and Mondays. Sundays cos I don want my weekend to end so soon, and Monday cos I have yet to get over the fact that my weekend has ended. So effectively, I don really have enough sleep for the 2 days in a row already. When its Tuesday, and after a long day at work, I will become really sleepy after I return home.
Sitting comfortably in front of the TV, not wanting to move will definitely cause me to doze off. So you see the dilemma here. I really want to watch my favourite show but my eyelids are going against me.. In the end, I will always end up in front of the TV, with the earphones plug in, hugging a huge pillow and dozing off. Sometimes I would just jerk awake and try to concentrate on the show but I will always lose out in the end and doze off again.
Sigh.. And its only 9pm now and I am already starting to doze off.. How to survive until 11pm when the show ends?
Its CSI day on Tuesday. And I get to see Grissom and gang perfoming magic in their labs with their amazing, but possibly fake equipment. And also get to hear witty and sometimes dry jokes cracked by them when they are performing their magic. Amazing..
The problem is that I always sleep very late on Sundays and Mondays. Sundays cos I don want my weekend to end so soon, and Monday cos I have yet to get over the fact that my weekend has ended. So effectively, I don really have enough sleep for the 2 days in a row already. When its Tuesday, and after a long day at work, I will become really sleepy after I return home.
Sitting comfortably in front of the TV, not wanting to move will definitely cause me to doze off. So you see the dilemma here. I really want to watch my favourite show but my eyelids are going against me.. In the end, I will always end up in front of the TV, with the earphones plug in, hugging a huge pillow and dozing off. Sometimes I would just jerk awake and try to concentrate on the show but I will always lose out in the end and doze off again.
Sigh.. And its only 9pm now and I am already starting to doze off.. How to survive until 11pm when the show ends?
Monday, August 01, 2005
Random pictures
DSC00018
Originally uploaded by blurfroggie.
I just bought a new toy yesterday. I am now official proud owner of a new K750i ! Hah!
And feeling really bored with nothing better to do, I have been taking pictures, making full use of its 2 megapixels camera, which was what attracted me to buy it in the first place..!
Take a look at the night lights in my neighbourhood!
Beautiful!
Random thoughts today
Take a look at the people around you when you are walking on the streets one day and you will find that its actually amazing when you think about the relationships that you are actually forming with them. You might not even talk to them at all but there is certainly a certain level of superficial relationship. Lets say you bumped into a little boy of 10 years old. Would you have thought that 10 years ago, this little kid was just born and then one fine day, you would rub shoulders with him?
Or to make it easier for the readers to understand my random chain of thoughts here, perhaps I should use a clearer example. Maybe 10 years ago, you were still a child but the bus driver who was driving you home from work was having a fun time playing truancy in school. You on the other hand were still in your diapers. However, its just this one fine fateful day that both of your paths crossed on the bus, he, doing his job while you, rushing to yours on his bus. Or maybe your girlfriend was just born when you were still a 2 years old toddler but then one fine fateful day, you crossed path with her and a beautiful relationship blossom.
Isn't it weird how our paths will cross with strangers and then start a relationship with them, no matter how superficial the relationship is?
Is there some kind of mathematical equations that will predict if 2 totally unrelated persons would cross paths one fine day?
I think I am confusing you readers here...
Or to make it easier for the readers to understand my random chain of thoughts here, perhaps I should use a clearer example. Maybe 10 years ago, you were still a child but the bus driver who was driving you home from work was having a fun time playing truancy in school. You on the other hand were still in your diapers. However, its just this one fine fateful day that both of your paths crossed on the bus, he, doing his job while you, rushing to yours on his bus. Or maybe your girlfriend was just born when you were still a 2 years old toddler but then one fine fateful day, you crossed path with her and a beautiful relationship blossom.
Isn't it weird how our paths will cross with strangers and then start a relationship with them, no matter how superficial the relationship is?
Is there some kind of mathematical equations that will predict if 2 totally unrelated persons would cross paths one fine day?
I think I am confusing you readers here...
Help..
Ok, I need help.
For those who know me, you would know that I need to go back to JB for my lasik eye treatment. There is one last check up at JB and I have no one to go with me. I have been asking my friends to join me but the problem is that the day falls on a Friday and it is a working day so they can't excuse themselves from their work. It would be unfair for me to ask them take leave. I also can't postpone it to the following Saturday cos I am having a stock take in my company and I can't excuse myself on that day.
So who is willing to accompany me to JB? I really don want to go there alone.
And no, I am a poor girl after buying my new K750i phone so I can't afford to give any monetary rewards for your companionship!
Edit: The appointment is on the 19th of Aug. Anyone anyone?!
For those who know me, you would know that I need to go back to JB for my lasik eye treatment. There is one last check up at JB and I have no one to go with me. I have been asking my friends to join me but the problem is that the day falls on a Friday and it is a working day so they can't excuse themselves from their work. It would be unfair for me to ask them take leave. I also can't postpone it to the following Saturday cos I am having a stock take in my company and I can't excuse myself on that day.
So who is willing to accompany me to JB? I really don want to go there alone.
And no, I am a poor girl after buying my new K750i phone so I can't afford to give any monetary rewards for your companionship!
Edit: The appointment is on the 19th of Aug. Anyone anyone?!
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