Sunday, January 22, 2006

Tell me what is this

Have you ever been involved with something and when the whole episode ended, you were left wondering what had just happened, confused and miserable cos you were like caught in a whirlpool, unable to control your situation? Its like getting swept off by a hurricane and landed in some strange, unfamilar place, scared and angry that you allowed yourself to be picked up by the hurricane in the first place.

Whats the difference between infatuation and love? Google has quite let me down this time. I am not really satisfied by the answer provided by my best friend..

Actually, on hindsight, I am not exactly interested by the difference between infatuation and love. Probably cos I am not very sure there is a difference in the first place. I am of the opinion that love has to start somewhere and that somewhere should really be infatuation. Or rather, to put it in a more corny way, the seed of love is infatuation. Infatuation makes one blind while love is supposed to open one's eyes to flaws, accepting it and yet, "Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind." So this probably implies that love is blind and as such is really a deeper form of infatuation. Or does it?

The only thing I am very sure about between love or infatuation or whatever you want to call it, is that they hurt, a lot. So much so that the pain actually becomes physical. Isn't that quite amazing? Something that is unseen and yet, can be felt so clearly. Its like having your heart cut out, thrown into a blender, and then made to watch while the blender is switched on and cutting your heart into millions of tiny pieces until nothing is left but a glob of flesh and muscle mixed with tears. And all the while you are able to feel the whole process. After which, you have no idea how to carry on with your life but still have to grit your teeth and force yourself to continue the journey, your life journey, for the sake of others.

The main difference between love and infatuation would be that for infatuation, the pain goes away sooner. After a while, your memories become foggier and foggier until at last, you no longer remember the reason for your infatuation towards that someone and then regrets set in.

Love on the other hand is much more complicated. The pain and anger do not seem to go away, though perhaps lessen a little. Memories still remain as clear as if the whole event just took place yesterday. And yet, there is no regret. No regrets at all.

"I will never be able to forget what happened and let go."


Now I know why.

4 comments:

Calamity Man said...

woh-oh, looks like someone been burnt before.

you'll meet your knight one day for sure... i think.

Iris said...

On well, I am sure most of us, if not all had been burnt in relationships before. Its just a matter of coping with the aftermath.. :)

Paddy Tan said...

Our feelings can accelerate from zero to infinite and back to nothing again in matter of seconds or none.

Girl, we are afterall human.

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