I was feeling rather down for the past couple of days. Maybe its my menses, but they were already gone. Perhaps shes decided to revisit me again. Damn. I cried until my eyes were swollen and freaked my parents out in the process and I have to go out later. Another damn. My PMS is scaring me a little. I get really really sensitive when I am having that. And then my anger and emotions will turn inward and I would think of ways to hurt myself. Its scaring the hell out of me. I mean, I have PMS previously but not anything like this. And its getting worse as I become older.
Anyway, as the story goes, as soon as my bout of irrationality comes, it went as fast as well. I booted up my lappie and surfed around.
And then I hear the birds chirping outside, the sun shining outside and Ozzie walking lazily around and I figured, things aren't so bad after all. The world is still spinning and I am still alive. I am still young, though the idea of hitting 30s is scaring me a little. You've got to admit it, I am getting old. Shit.
I thought of giving up this blog, to go away and take a breather for a while so that perhaps I can clear my head a little and think about what I want but then I figured, whether I go away or stay here, no one is gonna care.
So, I just wrote this entry, just to perhaps let everything out a little, just this while.
Maybe life is really beautiful after all. I am alive, I have all that I need, more than what I need actually. I have a secured job, I am independent, I am healthy. Most importantly, I am young. I can do anything that I want and set my mind on. Its just a matter of determination and objectivity.
With the coming of the new year, I resolve to be objective and grow up. I was just telling my mom that I will hit my 30s soon and as expected she asked me to get married. *roll eyes*
My new year resolution for 2007 shall thus be as below:
1) To earn $10k for the year and grow my savings for another $10K
2) Build my career
3) Get a driving license
4) If I am not married by 30, I shall get myself a car and perhaps a house, all by myself.
5) Shed 5kg and 5 inch from my waistline.
This shall be my guideline for how I am going to live 2007, any other things that do not fall within these 5 objectives shall be ignored so that I shall not be distracted.
Happy New Year everyone, may you get what you want for the new year and fulfilled whatever resolutions that you have for the new year ahead. :)